Gardenia

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The full moon has never lived up to it’s reputation for me more so than it did yesterday. Here is what happened:

I don’t remember waking up yesterday. I only remember my walk to the metro station. The metro ticket machine gave me five dollars when I bought a two dollar train ticket. The train that I was on stopped 5 times for no reason in particular (not that weird, but still a little strange.) I made it to work and ran off to Starbucks for my usual venti 3 pump white mocha iced coffee. The girl working the register messed up my order so she gave it to me for free! I gave her the 5 dollars that the metro gave me for free as her tip.

When I walked into my office, the ladies were in their usual morning gossip spot, talking about the difference between halls and other cough drops. I had to squeeze past the perfume posse in order to make it to my seat. Laura had left about three guavas at work the night before, and did not want them anymore. Carmen’s favorite fruit is guava so she was the first to jump up and take Laura’s offer. She was offering me a bite when, after 2 bites, she saw a little white worm crawling around the pink middle. I pointed it out to her, and once she set eyes on this little thing, she quite literally turned green. All of our jaws dropped and Carmen ran out of my office and into hers. We could here the lysol can pushing out its last few sprays of Carmen’s favorite cure all. I still don’t understand why she sprayed everything after the maggot incident, but it was really funny.

Sometime after lunch, Stephen sits down at his desk and realizes that his phone receiver was missing! He was so confused, and walked into our office up front and accused us of playing a mean prank. Laura and I looked at each other innocently, and rightly so! Finally, one of his old clients from earlier in the day walks in with Stephen’s phone receiver hanging from a string around her neck. She was obviously a little crazy. This became obvious, at the expense of mine and Laura’s eyes, when she leaned over the counter, and two floppy breasts plopped out of her shirt and onto the counter. Carmen came around the corner at that very moment, and gagged very loudly. Laura screamed and I gasped then dialed Stephen’s extension.

On the way to the mail room, I ran into a very old friend that I have not seen in ten years. I was crossing the street at a pedestrian cross walk when this white car didn’t stop in time and hit me. It wasn’t bad at all, or dramatic; just a charlie horse, really. The person driving runs out, and starts apologizing right away, and I was about to snap at them when I looked up and saw my best friend from second grade. What was almost a negative situation, turned into a very funny happenstance meeting. We had a cup of coffee and went our separate ways.

I ran into Malainie at the metro station after work.I decided to hang out with her as I haven’t seen her in a long time. We went to Miracle Mile and people watched for an hour before she started feeling nauseous. We drove back to her house and hung out there for a few minutes before she drove me home…sort of. When we were in front of my house, her boyfriend called and told her to drive all the way to kendall to pick him up. She didn’t want to drive alone so I offered my services as part navigator part passenger seat driver. For anyone that knows me, you know that this had a lot of potential to turn out disastrously. Well, we got lost a couple of times, but all was well until we ran out of gas. Thankfully there was a gas station like 3 feet away and we were buying candy when the car gave up. We put some gas in and continued on to her boyfriend’s mom’s house. I met his little brother, Reno who is really cool. I taught him how to draw a cube, and we played with leggoes for an hour while Malainie talked to her boyfriend’s mom. We left and made it back to my house at about 11.

Vicky surprised me and picked me up. We went to her boyfriend’s house and played music, smoked, watched 2 hours worth of ridiculous 80’s montages. After this, she drove me home and we talked in Spanglish about art, and highschool funnies. Once at my house, we ate 3 massive bowls of cereal, watched Aladdin, then said our goodbyes. I forgot to give her her sorpresa though.

This post took place on Wednesday, not Thursday.

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