Sick booger faced crazy


Finally, the flowers are blooming signifying the start of Spring. And for that, I thank my lucky stars. No more freezing nights curled up next to a space heater. I can enjoy the great out doors once again!

For the past week, I have been for quite the ride. My energy has been bouncing back and forth, and my creative outlet has a purpose once again. Since I don’t have very many friends, all I do on my spare time is paint. My cleaning binge is over, and my messiness is back in full force. That’s okay though; I like my messes (my room mates don’t).

I planted some daisies and I was surprised at how giddy I felt when I saw their little green heads sprouting with a tiny seed hat clinging on before the onset of more leaves. I feel like a child again, my old self is starting to seep back in and that makes me happy. For a little while I thought that part was gone forever.

This Madame Bovary piece is definitely coming along quite nicely. It’s definitely an ongoing experiment, seeing as I don’t really have a solid plan for it. I’ve been waking up at 6 am every day to work on it, and staying up until 2 am working on the details. It’s like meditation! Every bit of emotion is being transferred to my art, which is nice since I am an over thinking, nervous, emotional mess sometimes. Sleep comes on a lot more easily these days, and dreams haven’t been as turbulent, though still pleasantly vivid.

Last night’s dream:

I’m with Meg and we are at starbucks, she bought me an iced coffee. Next thing I know I’m running to the school that’s across the street from my house. It’s dark outside and it is the end of the world or something. The school is a shelter. I was running with Meg and her boyfriend. The entrance looks like my high school gym. I am alone now, in a dark hallway with a flashing light. I’m not afraid, just curious as to what the hell is going on and why there aren’t more people in the hallways. I’m looking for my suitcase. A little boy with glasses grabs my hand and tells me to follow him because he knows the “secret way”. Out of curiosity, I follow him. We get into an empty elevator and it stops in between floors, we get out. I keep following him through winding passage ways. There are people screaming around me but the hallway is empty. I wasn’t afraid, though I knew that something terrible was happening. Finally, he opens the door to a classroom and there are my tiny suitcases next to a stern faced teacher, trying to teach her class long division. This teacher freaked me out the most ( or maybe the math did). I thanked the little boy and stuck my tongue out at the teacher for yelling at him. Now I am in the administration office, and all of the office walls are glass. There is a blonde haired girl with tiny shorts on and a tube top sitting at a desk in the office next to me. A demon creature man thing is standing behind her with a knife in his hand. I bang on the glass trying to warn her but she can’t hear me. Her mother is sitting across from her, she doesn’t care. The girl turns her head and confuses the thing with her boyfriend. He drags her off into the darkness. I’m running through this glass office trying to find the bathroom. There is a line. I hear strange noises and the blonde girl tries to attack me. I grabbed her face and sent white light (?) into her mouth. She goes back to normal, but before this she threatened to kill me. I punched her and ran. I go outside and the demon man thing is preaching to a crowd. The girl’s mom is there. I run up to him and punch him then hop into a car that you are driving and we go back to starbucks, I finish my iced coffee and Meg apologizes for leaving me alone.

Weird but fun. I woke up at three am, made some tea and ate 5 chocolate chip cookies, then went back to bed and dreamt about a film festival.


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