Alvin Row


Here is an excerpt from Fitzgerald’s The Beautiful and the Damned. I was reading this in my dream last night. Interesting, very interesting.

“‘Then I went to school. For fourteen years half a hundred earnest men pointed to ancient flint-locks and cried to me: ‘There’s the real thing. These new rifles are only shallow, superficial imitations.’ They damned the books I read by calling them immoral; later the fashion changed, and they damned things by calling them ‘clever.’

“And so I turned, canny for my years, from the professors to the poets, listening- to the lyric tenor of Swinburne and the tenor robusto of Shelley, to Shakespeare with his first bass and his occasional falsetto…I gave ear to Browning chatting, Byron declaiming, and Wordsworth droning…I learned a little of beauty-enough to know that it had nothing to do with truth- and I found, moreover, that there was no great literary tradition; there was only the tradition of the eventful death of every literary tradition…Then I grew up, and the beauty of succulent illusions fell away from me. The fibre of my mind coarsened and my eyes grew miserably keen. Life rose around my island like a sea, and presently I was swimming.”

-The Beautiful and the Damned (p.209)

There is nothing that scares me more than a blank canvas waiting expectantly for my next burst of creative energy. Knowing that I can paint anything on it, I create expectations for myself; goals attainable yet unattainable because I procrastinate, staring, wondering if I can create what is already so vividly painted in my mind.

I really love this song…Animal Collective is definitely one of my top 3 favorite bands ever!


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